..the DIOR kiss..

assalamualaikum..

sy rase nk share story ni dgn korang semua..
coz sy rase crite ni myntuh hati sesiapa yg membacanya..
ia x ada kena mengena dlm khidupan sy..
tapi,crite ni berkaitan dgn seseorng yg ade kena mengena dlm hidup sy..
x pelah.. asalkan sy bahagia.. hehe2.

MY mum grew in tradisional CHinese family where open expressions of love
were never encouraged.. When she had me and my three siblings, she treated us with the same hard hand.. It was not that she was a slave driver or nothing, but she never openly
showed affection.. Instead, she demonstrated that she cared in more practical ways.......

My parents couldn't have been more different emotionally.. My dad is really open-hearted person who constantly showers us with hugs and kisses no matter the occasion.. After much persuasion from my dad, my mother did try to change, but it was clear that she never felt quite right expressing her emotions.. Eventually she reverted to her old self..

The differences between my parents was never more stark than during during the times I brought home a very good results from school... My dad would practically jump for joy, offering warm and effectionate words of congratulations.. And my mother?
"Ah,good,good," she would typically say witha tense smile etched on her face. "dO better next time, OK,??"..

I tried not to hold a grudge against her for being so reserved.. That was just her in way, I reasoned..

It was the kisse that we children secretly yearned for.. We received a peck on the cheek from her once a year on Chinese New Year when gave us ang-pow.. I can remember the kisses, awkward and wet, from her DIOR lipstick.. We would rub the smudge on our cheek,trying to look disgusted but secretly glad to get once-in-a-blue-moon kiss from our mum..

Last year, I was called for an entrance interview at a private medical university in Kuala Lumpur.. I desperately wanted to get accepted.. Since we live in Pahang, two states away, I decided to go there by bus.. My mum being her usual worrywort self,said it was not sAfe for me to take the 5 hours bus trip alone and insisted on coming alone...

I had never been a morning person and wasn't too happy about getting up at 7 a.m on the day of the interview.. As soon as we boarded the bus, I just plopped down onto a window seat and turned my back to my mum.. She knew what i was like and sat down behind me without saying a word.. As the bus pulled onto the highway, drowsiness began to take over and i was asleep in no time...

Not long afterwards, I was awakened by the pitter-patter of rain on the window.. I kept my eyes closed- it allowed me time to think and just relax.. MY head was lolling to the left, close to my lovely mum.. Then, just as i was about to open my eyes, I felt her hand caressing my cheek.. That really threw me off.. I squeezed my eyes tighter,not knowing what to expect next.....

I heard my murmur,"I LOVE YOU SO MUCH...".. aND then it came a wet kiss, tinged with the familiar feeling of the expensive DIOR lipstick, on my cheek...

I was stunned.. As tears welled in my eyes, I turned to the other side to prevent her from seeing them.. I slowly opened my eyes and stared out of the window, gazing at the trees whizzing past on the highway.. The lump in my throat just kept growing and growing....
I practically had to force it down to prevent my mum from hearing my sob...

Never in all my life, did i expect such a gesture from my "colder than stone"mum.. It made me realise that she did love me, even though she never made a big show of it.. Instead, she demonstrated her feelings through all the title things she did, like taking time off work to accompony me all the way to my interview..

I did not think I could face her without bowling my eyes out.. However, With all of the emotional strength i could muster, I turned towards her.. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was slightly open.. As i gazed at her face, peppered with wrinkles and lines that showed her age,I realised at that point that i was looking at my mother in a whole new light..

Then, as if my stare had awakened her from her slumber, her eyes fluttered open and she turned to me..What,? Do I have something on my face..?? Aiyo! Why are your eyes so puffy? Is it allergies again,?? I told you a thousand times to bring your medication.. You never listen..."

I held back asmile as I listened to her go on and on.. For once,I was not irritated or annoyed by what she said..It was just her way..

The interview went well.. and i was accepted in the university.. When my mother comes to visit, she fuses about my clothes,my room and just about everything else... It can still get on my nerves , but then I think back to that moment on the bus and the ill feelings melt away..

I finally, understand that all she does is out of love, and that means more to me than a wet DIOR kiss....